I hate that Len Bias died

Yesterday marked the 25th Anniversary of the death of Len Bias. Many don’t know who Len Bias was, and to me that’s the shame of the entire matter.

Len Bias was the best college basketball player in 1986, and on the verge of going to the NBA and dominating. He was a freakish athlete. Imagine this. The size of Lebron, the hops of Jordan, and the shooting touch of Bird.

If you think I’m exaggerating ask Michael Wilbon, Tony Kornheiser, James Brown, and the like. He was a can’t miss prospect. He would have gone to the NBA and averaged 20, 8, and 5 in his first year.

The crazy thing about the NBA was that the Boston Celtics, who had just won the 1986 NBA championship, had maneuvered to get a chance at drafting Bias. They used the high draft pick they had and drafted Bias. He would have played alongside; Bird, McHale, Parrish. They would have been unstoppable.

Let’s play the what-if games for a moment. If Bias had lived another 10 years these occurrences would have been highly probable.

No attempt at a three-peat for Magic and the Showtime Lakers.
No repeat for Isiah and the Bad Boy Pistons.
No 1st three-peat for Jordan, and the Bull.
No Jordan retirement in 93’.
No repeat for Olajuwon, and the Rockets.
Bill Russell, not Jordan, would still be widely considered the G.O.A.T.


Unfortunately Bias didn’t live past June 19, 1986. I remember exactly what I was doing when I heard the news. I had just finished 8th grade and summer break was about 3 days old. I was lying in bed thinking about going downstairs to make my breakfast of champions (Sugar Smacks, and Pop-Tarts).

I was also thinking about a conversation I had the night before with one of my buddies. I’m a huge 76ers fan, and Bias had just been drafted by the archrival Celtics. I had watched Bias the last 3 years, and I knew he was great. My buddy was a Celtics fan, and he kept saying the Celtic were going to dominate the 76ers now. I tried to argue with him, but knew in my heart he was right.

On the morning of the 19th my buddy called while I was still in bed thinking about Sugar Smacks. He told me Bias had died. Had to be a practical joke right? But I heard the seriousness in his voice. He told me to turn on the news. I ran downstairs, turned the TV on, and there it was. It’s was a nightmare. I just broke into tears. I couldn’t contain myself. It didn’t matter what team I was a fan of, in that moment, I was a fan of life, and I felt like we all were being cheated. I was a 14-year old kid that idolized a 22-year old basketball player.

I lost my innocence that day, and the world lost a great basketball talent. In my opinion, all due respect to Marcus DuPree, Len Bias is “the best that never was.”

Rest in Peace #34.

I hate that people don't understand the beauty of the Gentleman's Club

Why do most people assume only “thirsty” men go to Gentleman’s Clubs? If you’re not familiar with the term thirsty it’s a black colloquialism that means eager or wanting. The term is usually used in reference to a man that is “too” eager to advance physicality with someone he is attracted to.

This notion can be put to bed because many highly successful, attractive men with means frequent the Shoe Show! I have to assume that these guys have access to attractive women, and aren’t in a perpetual dehydrated state.

Many women hate that their men frequent the Show. Some men don’t understand the allure. I have a few buddies that say "why get yourself all excited when you have no chance of closing the deal."

I’m not even sure those of us that go to the Show, really know, on a mental level, why we love it so. It’s just natural, like eating, breathing, sleeping. It’s in our DNA. It’s innate, genetic, and feels right, so why fight it?

I’ll attempt, using MATH, to shed some light on the situation.

First men love the Show because it’s an alternative universe. Think about it. If you could enter a different dimension that suspended disbelief, and was basically a “Bizarro” world on steroids, wouldn’t you want to take that trip?

Add to that that your safety is not compromised in any real way, and that you could leave said “Bizarro” world at any time without any negative repercussions.

Multiply that by the fact that you can go with your favorite people, and share the experience with them.

Divide this by the fact that you can enter this world for about the same amount of money that it would cost you to have lunch at Panera Bread.

Equals - NO BRAINER! You’re going!

Now, I consider the Show an alternative universe because of the social engineering that takes place once the door frame is compromised. The male-female dynamic is totally flipped. In most real life cases, men initiate communication between men and women, but in “Bizarro” world the roles are eloquently flipped. The woman is the catalyst. This is appealing to men.

Also the cash and carry economics appeal to men. The rules are set. If you order a lap dance off the menu it costs a standard amount. In our personal lives we date, and we don’t have any clue what a lap dance will cost us. We keep paying for things but never truly know when our laps are going to have a little extra company. It’s a Ponzi Scheme. Money goes in at your own risk with no guarantee of returns.

The male bonding aspect of the Gentlemen Club experience cannot be overlooked. Men are spectators by nature. We love to watch together when the outcome of an event is hanging in the balance. We love sports because of its competitive nature. On many levels the Gentlemen Club compares favorably to a sporting venue. The men go to be entertained, adult beverages are served, the dancers wear uniforms and are in competition with each other, and outcomes are unknown.

You never know what you’re going to see at the Show. I once met a woman that, up until that point, was an idea in my head. A figment of my imagination, if you will. In my mind the most attractive amalgamation of female genetics, strictly based on looks, is a mixture of Black and Asian (65%-35%). If it were not for the Show, on that fateful night in Cleveland Ohio, I would have never had the pleasure of meeting a Blasian Woman. The Blasian Woman was my mystical unicorn. Missing that would have hurt me in an unknown spiritual way. I’m thankful for not having to experience that pain.

Side bar. Blasian is the much hotter cousin of (Blackanese) the oft-used term that essentially means the same thing.

One of the most beautiful aspects of the show is that, on occasion, it gives us a glimpse at our most self-actualized counterparts. One of the most exciting occurrences at the Show is when a woman transforms into a force of nature and creates her own “Hot Spot” giving us all the ability to connect to her “Wi-Fi.” It’s amazing.

There is a point when the stage is full of beautiful women, the music is right, and the air is filled with expectations. The energy is out of control, and we are approaching a breach. A confident woman, in the distance, steps to the forefront, takes the lead and becomes a human conduit. She begins dancing right where she is. The electric current seeks her out. She is in control of everything that is happening in that time and space. All eyes are on her, and we can’t look away. The connection is unmistakable. She becomes one with the night, the music, the energy, and the moment. In this dimension woman is self actualized, and we (all of us) are living through her.

SEEING WOMAN IN THAT STATE IS THE ESSENCE OF BEAUTY AND WHY MEN CAN'T STAY OUT OF THE GENTLEMAN’S CLUB!

I hate that Stacey Dash has found the "Fountain of Youth" and hasn't divulged its locale

Stacey Dash has to be the hottest 45 year-old on record. I challenge anyone to identify something hotter.

I usually reserve my blog entries for very serious matters like, arguments for strengthening phone etiquette, debating hierarchy of sports lists, and sharing personal pet peeves; real heady stuff. However today I will make a fun exception and give a well-deserved shout out to a freak of nature.

I had kind of forgotten about Dash. I first saw her in “Clueless”. She was 29 year old in real life then playing a 17 year old. She’s hasn’t done a lot of mainstream work recently. So you know…. “Out of sight…..Out of mind.”

Monday night I had just returned home from a cross-country trip. I had spent time in St Louis, and Las Vegas over the previous 3 days, and got very little sleep. As I was driving home from the airport I was craving my bed, and looking forward to at least 8 hours of make out time with my pillow. I get home, unpack the truck, head up to the bed, fall in, and then commence to stare at the ceiling for 2 hours. I hate it when that happens! My mind could not shut off.

I turn on the TV to change the mood, start flipping through the channels, and there it was. A blue lace dress with a black goddess sown in it. Don’t get me wrong this isn’t me being creepy, it's just me appreciating something that seems to be timeless. This woman looks the same. Scratch that. This woman looks better than she looked 15 years ago.

Stacey, if you’ve found the fountain of youth please don’t keep it to yourself. I was taught growing up that “Caring is Sharing.” We need this! Looking forward to being amazed 5 years from now when you turn 50!